Thursday, September 5, 2013

the newborn bubble.

So each time we've had a kid, there is a period immediately following that we in my house have termed the "newborn bubble."

It is easy to spot. Easy to feel. It is those first couple of "honeymoon" weeks after a baby is born.

Ok, maybe honeymoon is not the best word for it...because they are still hard as hell.

But it is those weeks where everything is new. People are excited to meet the baby, the baby cries are still that cute newborn cry (maybe not at 3 am...), meals are brought, no work is done, the house is allowed to look a little messy, it feels like life is suspended for a little while as this new tiny human has forced its way into your hearts and home.

And this time is magical.

If I could bottle the feelings and the atmosphere during those first days I would and use it everyday...because really, what is better than someone's first days on earth?

pretty much nothing.

But it is to my deepest sorrow that those days cannot last forever. The bills need paid, and eventually people don't want to step over a million toys and see piles of dishes in your pigsty of a house (although lets be honest, the dish piles don't ever really go away..).

I also think there is a certain sacredness of the mama's first trip out alone.

The first time she is truly alone for the first time in at least 9 months.

I went to rite aid. But those 20 minutes were glorious...however it starts to pop the bubble.

When I was pregnant I often got knowing smiles, questions about the baby, people just perk up when they see that round baby bump.

and then you have the kid.

and your stomach deflates.

and you have this huge life altering event where you give birth and now have a child.

and no strangers even know.

to those in the Rite Aid, you just look like a tired woman in stained yoga pants and messy hair.

pop.


A week after she was born I attended the funeral of a seminary professor. In talking to someone after the (lovely, touching) service, they asked how my summer had been. "Oh, well, I just had a baby last week." "Oh my gosh!....[insert polite but not too intrusive questions about baby, you look great, etc]"

but in going out without this thing I love so much..
Pop.

the bubble seems to be multi-layered as you enter the human race in small steps.
going out with the baby, going out without the baby, having your first adult beverage, paying bills, going back to work, going back to school, and then the change of season.

The change of season feels like suddenly your summer baby seems so old as the chill comes in the air and pumpkin spice lattes appear at starbucks (in gettysburg, people!)...and the baby is old news.

but to me, it feels like I just had her yesterday. Like my body is still recovering and I'm dragged out of my bubble to rejoin the human race and participate in a society where not everyone just had this life changing humongo event.

and so my newborn bubble continues to pop, and perhaps I'm holding onto it more this time as Lucy turns 2 months old today...

...but man could I live in this bubble forever.



No comments:

Post a Comment